I don't talk about motivation quite often. Everyone who has talked to me about motivation knows that I think getting external motivation is usually pointless and temporary. Motivation in my opinion comes from inside you. It is something no one else can preach to you about or give. Motivation is built by your life experience, desires, dislikes, and passions. To me motivation is more complex than just randomly getting the spark to start doing something. It is what gets you up every morning to go through life regardless of what happens or what is thought of you. Motivation is being able to break down, but knowing that it's part of the process rather than thinking it is the end. I see many people break down and decide to stop continuing whatever it is they set out to do....cool. That's your choice. That's you not being motivated. Motivation does not mean being happy and driven all the time, rather it is being able to accept the ups and downs of a situation in order to continue on and accept the process in order to succeed. I see people posting motivational quotes all the time and...it sort of irritates me. Why?Because the same individuals talk bad about others during the other times of the day. Being motivated and wanting to motivate others isn't a "when I feel like it" type of thing. Most motivating individuals spent their life trying to make a difference.....not 5 minutes in order to post to all their social media platforms an unoriginal quote. I decided to start blogging (probably 6 months ago) to get my ideas out in the world knowing that I'm not much of a social individual. Instead of beating myself up and keeping myself down about being anxious all the time, I decided to work on my strengths. I knew I was pretty good with computers, the internet, and that I had a lot to say... so I decided to give it a try. Now here I am today writing blog posts and coming up with quotes that pop up in my mind daily. I'm not trying to get famous or become "motivational", rather I am trying to spread my ideology for others to perceive life differently as well. So with all this talk about motivation....what motivates me?
I think there's no simple answer to this question. Though I get asked a lot what motivates me to continue training, to write posts that hardly anyone reads, and to make videos that have so little views (And in all honesty I don't know how many people will even read this post). What motivates me? What motivates me is helping others perceive life in such a way that we can change the world by the way we go about life, To help others think of fitness and training differently in order to use it for life, not just the gym. Motivation is kind of a funny concept, you know? You gain some, lose some....but if you have purely driven motivation inside you, you seem to find a way to continue towards your destination no matter how shitty life can feel or how tired you are of doing the same thing daily. I have no idea how many times I have felt so overwhelmed, yet couldn't go a day without writing some sort of post, quote, or just trying to do something productive. It wasn't because I wanted to, but because deep down inside I still had the motivation and passion to be productive and make this world a world worth living in. I feel we as individuals focus so damn hard on the negatives of life. We love to give ourselves reasons to quit. Not because we won't succeed, but because we know the stronger and more persistent we are, the more hard trials will become present. We know the more we try, the harder we fall. We know that the more time we spend on something, the more it hurts when it eventually ends. That's human nature. What I set out to do is to enjoy the longevity of the process. Enjoy what doesn't last, because that's what makes it so priceless. Just like motivation, the mind is a funny thing. We get into situation that make us cry, or even get purely depressed. The same situations, someone who has been through worse could laugh at your depression, because that situation seems like nothing. There are people who would kill for the life you have now. There are those happier with less than what you have. I have always found it interesting how the mind can change the world without the world itself changing. I aim to help others feel even though they have no control of the world, they still have control over their mind and how they perceive the world.
When it comes to fitness, what motivates me isn't the progress itself. Hell, I honestly don't care about my progress or even winning competitions anymore. The progress to me is a secondary result to my main goal. What motivates me to workout is the building of my character and getting comfortable with vulnerability. When it comes to building of character (or traits in general), I aim to build my patience, preparation, appreciation, focus, control,, and mental balance. I have found that the traits built and improved within my training help me immensely in life. Not the being lean or muscular, but being persistent and driven to succeed in whatever I set out to do. Now when it comes to the vulnerability part, it's more of my own motivation. Anyone close to me knows I have some anxieties I have yet to get over. I've progressed greatly, but they're still there. What training does for me (and why I am always so motivated to train) is because I get to fight that feeling of vulnerability. Anyone with any anxieties know the worst part of it is the feeling of being helpless and vulnerable no matter how safe you really are. Being breathless and not being able to think clear. Having your mind set on the negatives. That's what I seek to fight every time I walk into the gym. I've been a fan of lifting heavy, and many times to failure without a spotter. I have always been a fan of squatting heavy without pins setup or a spotter. It is replicating that same anxiety that I set out to achieve and learning to fight it and win. I feel different in the weight room, because I am a different person. When all I did was train heavy I probably would be seen as annoying by the grunts and yells I would give off getting amped up and during a set, while away from the gym I hardly spoke. When I train I aim to find that anxiety and conquer it, while outside of the gym I aim to avoid it. Inside of the gym I can make any conversation because I know what I'm talking about in there, while outside of the gym there's plenty I have no idea about and I hate the look of (damn he's stupid) that people give off. Being in the gym and living my second reality is what motivates me to train. Being invulnerable while seeking vulnerability is my obsession while training.
When it comes to life, I just see it differently and try to help others to do the same. When it comes to training, it just holds ore meaning to me than making progress. I've always been more of a "inside my own head" kind of person 24/7. Hell, I typically can't sleep without sleep medication because I am always thinking, always contemplating what my next step in life is. So to sum this up. What motivates me? Giving life more meaning.....a meaning that's different. Something personal to me, not something just anyone can feel. You can't make yourself give training a meaning such as mine. You can't make yourself think of life differently if you don't truly believe it. That's why I am motivated. Because I perceive differently.
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